Part-Time Lesbians

People hook up all the time. Especially in clubs. The liquor is flowing, the music blazing. The kind of mood bringer. You're out with your friends enjoying a good laugh making fun of the idiot that almost face-planted themselves going down the stairs, you know, the usual. Now when I say 'part-time lesbians', people may think bi-sexual? But no, it's not what this is about. There is nothing wrong with being sexual, it's part of human nature. There's nothing wrong with hooking up with a stranger in the club, given the lights and alcohol haven't blinded your voice of reason. Or vision.

 There are a specific group of females who find the need to make out publicly to draw attention to themselves. They are the girls that are usually surrounded by the drooling, trouser-bulging douchebags. I admit, we all tend to watch. It's like a train wreck, you wanna look away, but you can't. Now there's a difference when  you hook up with your friends in the comfort of someones home or behind closed doors than in public. These same girls make it hard for those of us trying to play the 'girlfriend' card when saving a friend on the dance floor.

My friends and I are part-time lesbians too. But for reasons to be rid of the creeps that are hip thrusting you from behind, whispering profane things in your ear and straight out ugly. One of us goes up to the unfortunate friend getting their space invaded, abuses 'happy pants' and claims them as their girlfriend. However this can backfire and the douchebag that was invading just one persons space, now thinks it's a good idea to ask for a threesome. It's not. And it's definitely not a cue for you to ask for both of us to go home with you, when clearly, one of us as it is don't want you in the first place.
Being a part-time lesbian has it's perks but sometimes friends like to cock block other friends, for the hell of it, by using the girlfriend card, and there's no happy vagina's or endings anywhere.